In a shameless attempt to persuade competitors to excuse his incompetent mistake, local Smash Bros. player Devin “EJ” Caffarel, who forgot to change his controls before starting a tournament match the previous weekend against Matt “Absoltastic” Brandl, apparently expected his fellow Smashers to forgive him just like that, shocked sources confirmed.

“He thinks he can carelessly start a match without his controls set, pause a few seconds in, follow up with the line ‘Sorry man, I didn’t put in my controls!’ and expect us to straight up forgive him? Unbelievable,” said resident player Victor “Saint Johns” Anderson, fuming after witnessing the audacious pause, which reportedly concluded with Devin saying “my bad, dude” in a final, desperate attempt to atone for the egregious error.

“He’s lucky he noticed and changed his controls so quickly afterward, but if he thinks that wiped the slate clean, then he’s sorely mistaken. Maybe a few months from now, but just a couple seconds after he did something like this? No way” explained an also agitated Andrew “SirLegend” Cole.

At press time, sources confirmed that a number of seething Smashers had slammed their controllers on the floor and stormed out of the venue to collect themselves.



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